Meaningless Tears

Every new day brings for me another gloom.

Every new face I see makes me believe that I'm a lune.

Every new hope I conceive dies the next second

And this didn't happen today- it has always happened.

So much uneasiness forced me to change the way I see the world

And ordered me to ponder upon all those words which I absent-mindedly hurled.

So I started re-shaping my mental contour to fit into the likes of all

I buried my ire forever into the cold ground during the snowfall.

I learnt to ignore all those things which were enough to get me mad

I even tried to shower honey onto everybody I see and not be bad.

I relaxed in my pursuit of seeking all the time everything which is finer,

And accepted everybody as they were and not make anything shinier.

But, there was one thing in me which I refused to change

And that was that I hated anybody breaking my trust.

I felt that it was only faith which strengthened a friendship

Keeping a friend's promise was a must!

Irony is that whenever I trust somebody I love very much

Breaks brutally the faith I have in him by selling his promise as such

To another person without caring if I would mind it or not

Without thinking that this gesture could hurt me a lot..

I have no idea how to respond to such a saddening situation

When such dear friends can expose my secrets without a hesitation.

And when I complain against their action in a firm voice

They simply say that it was necessary to share it and they had no choice!

I'm getting weaker by trying continuously to change my outlook

I feel as if I'm hanging over a hungry fire with the support of a cotton hook.

My body is blistered by these flames which are ready to devour me

But my heart feels cold due the trapped spirits of my dead glee.

My eyes are filled with tears and my heart protests in anguish

What do I want and what I don't my brain cannot distinguish.

I don't know if I should trust a face which appears genial and sublime

I'm tired keeping all the things I wish to share to myself every time.

Nobody cares about my feelings and to my desires nobody gives an ear

I'm always made a fun of, whenever my eyes produce a tiny tear.

All such actions of my friends puncture my covering which I had again built

And to make the matters worst, they deny that they were ever at guilt.

I'm breaking down slowly unable to bear any more betrayal by anyone

Of all the experiences I had, I deduce that it is always better not to face the sun.

I'm tired of turning the hourglass again and again, waiting for a time to come

When I don't find myself deceited and my heart never again turns numb.

I cannot withstand any more difficulty and I want to get out of of all this

I feel as if I'm struggling since eternity trying to make my life a bliss.

Today, I'm tired of fighting this battle in which I will overpower my old fears.

When will that time come when people find some meaning in my otherwise meaningless tears?